What’s wrong with me?

wrong with me

If you knew me, you’d probably say “absolutely nothing.”   Yet the question continues to be a big problem for the secret side of myself.   The side that I don’t let people see.   On the other hand, you could be correct.   Who’s to say that others who do things differently are the ones doing shit right?

Let’s discuss some of the concerns that I have with myself:

  1. I am an extremely private person. I don’t care how private you think you are, I’ll bet that I have you beat with that one.
  2. Once again, if you knew me I don’t think you’d guess that about me, because I can be very outgoing and friendly.
  3. I grew up as a middle child of three sisters.
  4. I never had a birthday party as a child, so I hate celebrating my birthday now. My birthdays come and go with others wanting to celebrate it, but I don’t.   I accept cards and gifts, yet they don’t seem to mean a thing to me.
  5. I don’t like other celebrations where I am involved either. I don’t give a damn who thinks it is an important event.  It doesn’t seem to matter to me.
  6. I have had great accomplishments with my education and career, yet when I graduated three times from Arizona State University, each one was just one more thing I’ve completed to me.
  7. When I opened my private practice, as much as I love what I do it just became “my job.”
  8. I gave birth to one son and adopted another. Was it a good thing to do?   I guess.   I was a great mother, but I’m not a constant “keep in touch mom.”  My sons treat me wonderfully and seem to have the highest respect for me.
  9. I don’t have a huge friend network, and I never really have. I really don’t think I want one.

10. There are very few people that I trust, and if you break my trust, or do any wrong              to me I don’t forgive easily.  And, I couldn’t care less whether you live or die.

Twice Bitten: Never Shy…


Ok, some people say once bitten twice shy…   I’m a woman who likes to keep going until I run out.   That’s why I say twice bitten once shy.

No, this isn’t about vampires, though it’s a great time of year for that sort of thing.  This is more about giving another human the time of day, so to speak.   I tend to do just that.   In other words, I enjoy giving people second chances; especially men.

There’s someone in my life who I haven’t seen since February 2019.   But we’ve planned to get together and getaway to a favorite spot later this month for a few days.   I’m looking forward to this event, NSA.   I don’t believe he feels the same way regarding NSA, I believe he wants much more.  Oh well, we’ll cross that bridge when we come to it.

I mean, why not?   We do have a lot of fun together.   The sex is superior, and it’s always good with someone you already know, right?


October 6, 2019: A Koan

zen 100

The Muddy Road, A Zen Koan

Tanzan and Ekido were once traveling together down a muddy road.  A heavy rain was still falling.

Coming around a bend, they met a lovely girl in a silk kimono and sash, unable to cross the intersection.

“Come on, girl” said Tanzan at once.  Lifting her in his arms, he carried her over the mud.

Ekido did not speak again until that night when they reached a lodging temple.  Then he no longer could restrain himself.  “We monks don’t go near females,” he told Tanzan, “especially not young and lovely ones.  It is dangerous.  Why did you do that?”

“I left the girl there,” said Tanzan.  “Are you still carrying her?”


Any thoughts on this one?

I knew it wouldn’t be long

I knew it wouldn’t be long before this caused the “Cuddle Doc” problems. There was one in the area where my office is located and recently a patron of her services called the police after she said the “professional” cuddle doc “allegedly” had her nipple in the patrons mouth for approximately five minutes.

And guess what, she paid $80 for an hour of “cuddling.” Except she did not expect the sexual activity…

So what happened:

Well the police said they couldn’t find anything wrong with what cuddle doc had done. They took it as “Consensual.”

Cuddle doc also has a massage therapist license. The patron called the board for massage therapists and was told it was not a massage issue because the cuddle doc was not doing massage at the time. She called Cuddle Doc who certified the woman and with police report and everything, they took her certification.

In my opinion Cuddle Doc is doing somewhat prostitution legally. Of course she became represented by an attorney.

This made the newspaper, television and radio. I have the link to the article but I won’t put it in this post. Anyone smart enough can google it.

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